240ish years ago, a brave group of men decided to give the British Monarchy the middle finger and our great country was born.
Fast forward to today.
Do you want to be interviewed for American news? Have a British accent and give us any bit of mindless drivel about the royal baby.
Why why why why why why why WHY DO WE CARE? WHY? WHYYYYYYYYY? What would George Dubya the Original and his other wig wearing friends think of this?
I've met a lot of really unlikable Brits. I make no secret of the fact they are not my favorite group of people. Plus their food is so bad that they try to claim curry as their own. Double strike. But even if I'd never crossed paths with treasures such as Bobby and NBG, and even if my favorite food was anything boiled, that would not change the fact that if you've been camped out in front of a hospital for TWO WEEKS, you need to take a step back and reevaluate your life because you've definitely taken a serious wrong step somewhere.
When I first started hearing about people waiting outside of the hospital, I though "Oh, paparazzi. What a strange life that would be!" Then I saw pictures of the hospital campers. They are not all people who use their obscenely expensive cameras to put food on the table. At this very moment, there are normal people standing outside of a hospital in England with their iPhones and little Canon Sure Shots, there for no other reason than to have a photo to upload to Instagram or Facebook with a hashtag about the royal baby. I feel the same way about hashtags as I do about the expression "just sayin"-once we eliminate both from our lives, the world will be a better place. But here are my royal baby hashtags: #Whocares? #Peoplehavebabieseveryday #Forgiveusthomasjefferson #Wouldkatehavestayedwithwilliamafterhelosthishairifhewasntroyalty? #Arehashtagssupposedtohavepunctuation?
I don't wait in line for any kind of tickets. I don't bring my tent to Best Buy at the end of October so that I can score a sweet Black Friday deal on a giant TV. If there are more than 3 cars in line at the drive thru, I try to find a different restaurant. Needless to say, waiting is not my strong suit. But even so, I cannot imagine waiting in front of a hospital. How many games of Candy Crush Saga can a person play before realizing "whoa whoa whoa, I'm waiting in front of a hospital for what now? What happened to my life?"
But, my real problem with this isn't the people waiting in front of the hospital. Fine, if that's how they want to spend their time. My problem with this is that it's unavoidable. I can't turn on the TV, listen to the radio, read the news, etc. without seeing or hearing something about this story. And for what? Waity Katie married into this family, and William was born into it. So while yes, they've done their good deeds because of their statuses, they haven't really earned anything. There have been a lot of baby comparisons between William/Kate and Kim/Kanye. Kim Kardashian sucks, and is famous for reasons along the same lines as William and Kate. But Kanye earned his fame, for being a rapper and a first rate @**hole. So at least North West has that going for her. Confession- Love Lockdown is on my running playlist.
I am so sick of this story, and the kid's not even here yet. I dodged the royal wedding bullet by being in Korea, where they really didn't care. Or maybe they did. Being blissfully oblivious is one of the good things about living somewhere you don't speak the language. Now I'm here, and subjected to such hard hitting stories like whether or not Kate will breastfeed, whether or not William will be in the delivery room, getting their "flat" ready for a baby, and of course what the kid's name will be.
Sure, it's worth a blurb or two, especially after the baby's born. But I've seen something about this multiple times a day for the past 6 weeks, and nothing has happened yet. Why why why why why why?
#Forgiveusthomasjefferson
Just sayin.
Fast forward to today.
Do you want to be interviewed for American news? Have a British accent and give us any bit of mindless drivel about the royal baby.
Why why why why why why why WHY DO WE CARE? WHY? WHYYYYYYYYY? What would George Dubya the Original and his other wig wearing friends think of this?
I've met a lot of really unlikable Brits. I make no secret of the fact they are not my favorite group of people. Plus their food is so bad that they try to claim curry as their own. Double strike. But even if I'd never crossed paths with treasures such as Bobby and NBG, and even if my favorite food was anything boiled, that would not change the fact that if you've been camped out in front of a hospital for TWO WEEKS, you need to take a step back and reevaluate your life because you've definitely taken a serious wrong step somewhere.
When I first started hearing about people waiting outside of the hospital, I though "Oh, paparazzi. What a strange life that would be!" Then I saw pictures of the hospital campers. They are not all people who use their obscenely expensive cameras to put food on the table. At this very moment, there are normal people standing outside of a hospital in England with their iPhones and little Canon Sure Shots, there for no other reason than to have a photo to upload to Instagram or Facebook with a hashtag about the royal baby. I feel the same way about hashtags as I do about the expression "just sayin"-once we eliminate both from our lives, the world will be a better place. But here are my royal baby hashtags: #Whocares? #Peoplehavebabieseveryday #Forgiveusthomasjefferson #Wouldkatehavestayedwithwilliamafterhelosthishairifhewasntroyalty? #Arehashtagssupposedtohavepunctuation?
I don't wait in line for any kind of tickets. I don't bring my tent to Best Buy at the end of October so that I can score a sweet Black Friday deal on a giant TV. If there are more than 3 cars in line at the drive thru, I try to find a different restaurant. Needless to say, waiting is not my strong suit. But even so, I cannot imagine waiting in front of a hospital. How many games of Candy Crush Saga can a person play before realizing "whoa whoa whoa, I'm waiting in front of a hospital for what now? What happened to my life?"
But, my real problem with this isn't the people waiting in front of the hospital. Fine, if that's how they want to spend their time. My problem with this is that it's unavoidable. I can't turn on the TV, listen to the radio, read the news, etc. without seeing or hearing something about this story. And for what? Waity Katie married into this family, and William was born into it. So while yes, they've done their good deeds because of their statuses, they haven't really earned anything. There have been a lot of baby comparisons between William/Kate and Kim/Kanye. Kim Kardashian sucks, and is famous for reasons along the same lines as William and Kate. But Kanye earned his fame, for being a rapper and a first rate @**hole. So at least North West has that going for her. Confession- Love Lockdown is on my running playlist.
I am so sick of this story, and the kid's not even here yet. I dodged the royal wedding bullet by being in Korea, where they really didn't care. Or maybe they did. Being blissfully oblivious is one of the good things about living somewhere you don't speak the language. Now I'm here, and subjected to such hard hitting stories like whether or not Kate will breastfeed, whether or not William will be in the delivery room, getting their "flat" ready for a baby, and of course what the kid's name will be.
Sure, it's worth a blurb or two, especially after the baby's born. But I've seen something about this multiple times a day for the past 6 weeks, and nothing has happened yet. Why why why why why why?
#Forgiveusthomasjefferson
Just sayin.
2 comments:
haha - well said! The only good thing about their wedding was that it has made it easier for people to remember our names when meeting us for the first time! "Will and Kate" is a lot more memorable now, I guess.
I watched the wedding, Laura, don't hate me! :)
Love, Aunt Ann
Post a Comment